Getting Engaged at 19
As most people know who frequent this page often, Dawson and I are engaged and have been for about 7 months. We got engaged when I was 19 and he was 22 and now we are 20 and 23. The road that we have traveled has been full of bumps and it hasn’t always been easy to overcome the controversy surrounding us. By controversy I mean people thinking that I am too young to be getting married.
I think that both of our parents supported our decision, they might not have agreed with us getting engaged at such a young age but I think they supported it in their own ways. Our siblings were also very supportive but like our parents didn’t really understand. My parents got married when they were around the age of 21-22 and his parents were in their early to mid-twenties when they got engaged. Both of our sisters also got engaged in their early twenties as well. I think they all understood where Dawson’s head was at, but nobody understood me more than my Mimi.
My Mimi got engaged when she was 18 and my Papaw was 22 and had just gotten out of the army. The reason I think she understands me the best is because she was telling Dawson to propose to me when we had only been dating for three months, after all, she got engaged after 4 months of knowing my Papaw and had an amazing 50 years with him before he passed. One thing that she has always taught me is that it doesn’t matter if you have all the money in the world, you won’t be happy unless you are with your one true love. She taught me that you can be dirt poor and just as happy as long as you are living out your days with the love of your life.
When I was growing up I was always close with my mom but at the same time, I felt that nobody understood me more than my Mimi. She understood that when I am mad I need to get away from everyone for a few minutes and calm down. She knew that when I was being stubborn about something that I was just really passionate about it. She knew that I was different than other little girls in the sense that I’d rather roll around in the dirt and go to rodeos than play dress-up. Granted my parents understood this too but she always made me feel heard. And I guess that is the job of a grandparent because they don’t have to be as strict as parents and grandchildren oftentimes do feel like they have more freedom when they are with their grandparents.
I grew up admiring my grandparents relationship right down to their “loud discussions”. I traveled with them to North Carolina and I stayed with them every holiday break and every weekend that I could. It was from them and my parents that I learned that it is okay to argue with your significant other, or as they would say “have loud discussions”. If you didn’t read my last article, go check it out, it covers that whole subject.
Everyone in my family has always known that I wouldn’t keep a guy around unless I saw a future with him. But for my Mimi to realize that Dawson was the guy for me before I did meant a lot to me. I have faced a lot of adversity from everyone about being 19 when we got engaged. Everyone said that I was too young, too naive, or too inexperienced in life. What they didn’t know is that I’m probably more experienced in life than the average 25-year-old. I moved halfway across the country when I was sixteen and left everything I knew behind. I graduated high school a semester early, after taking four college classes, and at 17 went to work full time before I went to college. AND THEN I moved 5 hours away from my parents to go to college, in the middle of COVID and knew two people at the entire school. I have struggled with mental health problems since I was 15 and through all of that, I have prevailed and been successful.
SO with all of that being said, I think that I am pretty mature and I don’t really think people have any place to comment on my age and how “young” I am to be getting married. That might sound a bit mean to say but it’s true, especially to those who know close to nothing about me. Getting engaged at 19 has not been easy by any means, but I can truly say that I am with the person I was destined for. He cheers me up when I’ve had a bad day, he makes me madder than a wet hornet sometimes, and he loves me with all of his heart. Thank you to everyone who has had faith in us and who has helped us along the way, because we might not have made it without those people’s faith.
8/4/2022 11:29:58 pm
This is a beautiful story Sydney. Once you two started dating I was hoping y'all two would get married. Your mimi is a great woman. I love Aunt Carol I'm glad she was pulling for you guys and could see your future together. I pray that the Lord will bless you and Dawson's marriage and that y'all will live happily ever after.
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Sydney Brooke Haywood